An Honorable Fate

I would have loved to do more of these as I've done in previous leagues but due to the turbulent nature of historical record keeping in this league, researching player and team history is quite difficult (in some cases impossible). Luckily, some is still preserved from the early league cross-over so I can still do these in a limited capacity. This story is particularly interesting because it's, well, sort of tragic.

Matt Duchene. One hell of a skill-player, but yet another of many to follow the lineage of discontent NHL souls since retired.

To give this some perspective, Matt Duchene was drafted by the Colorado Avalanche in 2009, 3rd overall, after Hedman and Tavares. Nice consolation prize. But as he developed he never was able to take his game to the next level and -at least to me- seemed stuck in some capacities. It wasn't until Matt Duchene was traded to Columbus did he realize what elite talent looked like (or so I inferred from his interview with THN magazine). But Duchene never played for Columbus. Not in PTPHL.

You see, before he was moved the league began with the last updated roster which still had him in Ottawa. For those who perhaps were living in a cave, Duchene was traded to Ottawa in exchange for ...we'll say a boatload of shit, all of which very valuable in today's NHL, and there's a very good chance every single one of those names will eventually make the NHL in some capacity. That very same season was the yearlong media disaster that was/is the Ottawa Senators. To pile another shit-patty atop this shit-storm-sandwich was the fact the Avs made the post-season by a single point in the very last game against the St. Louis Blues (who are peculiarly one win away from winning the Cup against the Bruins the next year, irl. At the time of this writing, there's no winner yet).

In this timeline of history, instead of going to Columbus and into the 2nd round of the playoffs, Matt Duchene was sent to the Devils for Joey Anderson in late February of 2019 on a bottom feeder year for New Jersey. More of the same. But at least he was out of Ottawa - who made the playoffs as the 8th seed. Like Colorado did.

The following season, however, they made the post-season and went on a deep run only to be eliminated in the 3rd round by the Pittsburgh Penguins (who would eventually fall to the Carolina Hurricanes in the Finals, for those of you keeping track). Not so bad right? Except Matt Duchene was in Florida when they did it. He was traded earlier that December with a 2nd for defensive help in Jake Muzzin and some shit-kicker named Lubomir Nickel* (who now presides over first line duties on the Stars in Texas - at the H-E-B Center). While Matty was 'enjoying' a beautiful early spring on the 26th place Florida Panthers, New Jersey safely made the playoffs by a full 10 points on the Ottawa Senators as the 8th seed.

Like Colorado.

And Ottawa.

There he stayed. And while he might be crushed that he never got to win a cup or do much in the playoffs, at least he could be a slightly richer millionaire in sunny-ass Florida. And after 6 years there I bet he's already fully set to retire. But not before possibly making one final run before the trade deadline. His services are available from Florida for one final run. Who knows, if he has the spirit, he might even have one more season left in him.

"Help me."

-Matt Duchene